Filed Under (Life) by Mike Wilton on 09-13-2007
Tagged Under : Mike Wilton
So I had planned on blogging like a month ago, but procrastination and chaos prevented me from posting anything. S0, today I decided to quit procrastinating and just write. I’m going to cover a lot here so if you usually read my posts go grab yourself a beer and a snack cuz this may take a while. I assure you the first half of the blog is entertaining, as it talks of the events that unfolded at Eddy’s bachelor party last month.
The night started out pretty tame. The hummer limo picked us all up at Eddy’s parents house, we then took a trek down to Hooters in Anaheim. The usual boobs, beer, and chicken ensued. Joe of course played the roll of the flirt and thus had two of the waitresses flirting with him the whole time we were there. One even went as far as creating him an elephant hat made out of foil, of course he didn’t want to mess up his hair so the damn thing was passed around until we all got sick of wearing it.
We ended the Hooters visit in the parking lot. All the guys sat around smoking cigars for about a half hour or so…kinda sucked to be the non-smoker, but what was I to do? After Ed’s mom picked up his dad from Hooters we made a quick beer run and then were on our way to Hollywood.
The trip down was awesome. I think everyone enjoyed the bachelor party mix I burned for on the way down. It consisted of White Zombie, GNR, Poison, Metallica and a handful of other bands. I really scored with Poison’s Nothing But A Good Time since Eddy damn near creamed himself when it came on. The trip down basically just consisted of really loud music, a lot of drinking, and the occasional instance of the guys sticking out of the top of the limo or hanging their head out the side like a dog.
The original plans to go to a club that J.J.’s friend worked at fell through so we wound up settling for a club that the limo driver suggested to J.J. called Sugars. This was essentially the turning point of the whole night. We were able to get a table thanks to the driver and didn’t have to pay the cover, however it turns out that without the cover you still have to meet the two bottle limit. Little did any of us know the bottles cost around $350 each. And no, that’s not a typo, two bottles of Kettle One Vodka wound up costing Joe and J.J. seven hundred dollars. We still wound up waiting for a while before we got in, and since we had all been drinking on the way most of us had to piss like race horses. Most of the guys decided to go back and let loose behind an RV that was parked in the parking lot, I held off until we got inside. What can I say? I’m a sucker for the guy who gives you the towel to dry your hands! LoL
I know it sounds insane, and really it was, but it wasn’t the decision of the rest of us and J.J. was the one who was supposed to be handling all of this so we figured since he made his bed, he could lie in it too. Hell I didn’t even know until we were in the club that it cost so damn much. I would have told him to just have the limo driver take us to a local bar, it would have been hundreds of dollars cheaper.
The music at the club wasn’t too bad. They had a nice mix of old and new and even incorporated some modern rock stuff into some of their mixes. I wasn’t too fond of the hip hop stuff, but then again when am I? Rick, Russell, Eddy, and myself pretty much kept to one little group around the table. Joe wandered to meet some lady friends, and J.J. just sat there most of the night…Probably contemplating his poor decision making. I would have been pretty quiet myself if I knew I had just spent $700 on $40 worth of Vodka.
The Vodka came with an array of mixers; orange juice, cranberry juice, and tonic. I stuck to the cranberry juice, which I would later find may have been a HORRIBLE idea. We all had quite a bit to drink that night. Russell and I finished off the second bottle, we finally started to feel a pretty good buzz just before we got ready to leave the club…Little did we know we were actually just working our way up to being piss drunk.
J.J was the first to lose it once we left the club. He wound up puking on the side of the building while we were waiting for the limo driver. I didn’t actually witness this, and if I did I have no recollection of it happening. We also lost Russell at some point during all of this, but luckily he surfaced at the entrance of the club shortly there after.
The limo ride home is nothing but a blur at this point to me. I remember getting to the hotel, but I don’t recall the trip there or much after that. I know after we paid the limo driver we got into the hotel and at some point got in the elevator…That’s when things go kinda downhill for me.
On the elevator ride up I lose it and blow chunks all over the elevator. I’m pretty sure this was mostly due to the fact that it is one of those elevators that goes up and down at extreme speeds and makes your stomach sink, because it made me a little nauseous the next morning as we were leaving. When we got to my floor I apparently puked in the hall, and then when we got to the room puked some more.
This started a chain reaction puke and as I puked in the sink Russell christened the toilet. Joe stood in the bathtub and held me up, and I believe he blew chunks shortly there after. The guys really took care of me during this. I remember Joe and Russell getting me some water to help with the vomiting and then putting me to bed. Unfortunately within those first few minutes of lying in bed I lost it again and wound up puking all over myself and then all over the floor. Sadly when I turned over to puke I was so drunk I basically threw myself out of bed and on to the floor which resulted in a shoulder injury which is STILL bothering me. I later found out from my sister-in-law who’s a massage therapist that on top of my shoulder being problematic I popped a few ribs out of place that night…GOOD TIMES!
After I had stopped my puking I finally got to bed. The guys left me for the night, but the craziness did not end there. I was out for the count, but there were still plenty of misadventures for the guys to get into.
On the way back to their room Russell and Joe apparently came across some french fries that someone had put out in front of their door for the room service people to pick up, but Joe decided he wanted them. He left french fries on peoples doors, ate some and chased them with a swig of ketchup until he finally realized he could dip the fries into the little bottle, and then at some point he dropped the plate of fries which someone sent Russell rolling. Sadly when he fell he face planted and bled all over the place.
Later Joe somehow came across a half gallon of milk and decided to poor the contents of it down the stairs from the 11th floor…
The next morning I woke up around 8:30 because I felt like I needed to puke again. I saw the remains of the night before on the floor when I woke up. To my right was a puddle of puke and nothing else. Everyone else wound up crashing in the other room so I got the room to myself. I puked a few more times before I took like a 45 minute shower. I felt pretty close to death, and I’m pretty sure that had I drank anymore I may have actually SEEN death.
After the shower I had to puke again, and I did. Joe and Russell showed up about mid-puke to check on me. From there we basically just gathered up all our stuff and checked out. Everyone was pretty trashed, but I think I was the worst. We barely got out of the valet drop off and J.J. had to jump out to puke. It was a close call since he had say on the inside of the seat and they had to pull open the van door. After a couple rounds of puking from J.J. we made a quick stop at CVS to grab some drinks to hydrate ourselves and then started our journey home.
Everyone did pretty good until we were about halfway home, that’s when I started to feel sick again. I asked Rick to pull over, he said he would but he hesitated a little and waited until we got to an offramp which was apparently too long because I wound up going projectile on his door before he came to a full stop. I wound up opening the door about mid puke and almost fell out of the van. I walked off to the side of the road once he stopped and puked my guts out some more. Lucky for him and Alisha I had lost everything the night before and the only thing I threw up was the water I had bought at CVS…Hence the projectile vomit.
I felt sick the remainder of that day and looked like hell. I popped tons of blood vessels in my eyes which looked gross as hell for about a week or so. The next couple of days I still felt like death. I came to a pretty good conclusion that I had got a mild case of alcohol poisoning which knocked me on my ass for most of the week. I called in to work that Monday and got sent home Tuesday because I kept puking. Needless to say I haven’t had much of a desire to drink since then. In fact I have only had one beer since this all happened, and that was last weekend.
The rest of the last few weeks have consisted mostly of baby preparation. We’ve been helping with the planning of the baby shower, I painted the babies room, I pulled up the carpet in the babies room so Misty’s dad could put in new carpet, and my dad and I started building the new shelves in the closet in the babies room. These tasks have taken up about 90% of my free time with the other 10% consisting mostly of watching reality TV like The Girls Next Door and Rock of Love with Brett Michaels.
We made time a few weeks back to go enjoy a barbecue over at Rick and Alishas with Robbie, Eddy and Pearl. It was the first time we had really been invited anywhere in a while and really felt it may be nice to break away from the baby work and just relax with friends. We ate, played the Newlywed Game, and watched funny videos on the computer. It was a nice break from all of the chaos of getting ready for the babies.
The house is a mess right now with boxes upon boxes filling the living room and kitchen. We had to clear out everything from the babies room to get it ready and we are in the process of clearing out part of our room so the crib will fit in there for the first couple of weeks. Tonight I ditched school because I have been exhausted this week and we just started the new module so I have 3 days of class I can technically miss. Tomorrow after work I am going to finish the closet with my dad, and we are going to the store with my mom to pickup some of the food and drinks for the baby shower, and then Saturday we have to go do something…but now I don’t remember what.
Sunday is Eddy and Pearl’s wedding and then the following weekend is our baby shower. The baby shower is going to be a blast. It’s co-ed and we have games for both the girls and the guys. We also scored a Winnie the Pooh bounce house for the little ones that are attending. It should be a blast there will be tons of great food and drinks and I hope it turns out to be a really fun celebration.
Speaking of the babies, things are going really well with them. They both weigh just over two pounds which the doctors say is really good for how far along Misty is. Misty will be 28 weeks tomorrow, but since she is carrying twins she is measuring at 38 weeks…Her belly has gotten huge with babies in the last month. For those of you who don’t know we are having one boy and one girl. The boy will be named Aiden and the girl will be named Cambria.
Things have been so crazy I am sure I have forgotten a few things. I have been excited to see that the stores have started getting Halloween merchandise in, but I have been even more excited to see that most of it sucks. This year we won’t have a lot of money to buy a lot of Halloween stuff so the more of it I don’t like the better. I’m going to miss Halloween this year. The Halloween Party was turning into such an awesome tradition and I don’t think this year will be the same without it. No Jesus and Satan hanging out, kinky Jorge and Nohemi (LoL), no awesome decorations and great goth tunes. = ( Oh well…I have vowed to return next year full force to make up for lost time.
Hopefully I’ll see a lot of you next weekend at the baby shower. For those of you I haven’t seen and won’t see I hope all is well! For those of you who haven’t RSVP’d for the baby shower, but want to come, just let me know. I know the invitations had a RSVP date on them, but you’re still welcome to come if you forgot to RSVP!