Reflection, appreciation, pride, and love flowed through me as I interacted with family, co-workers, and friends over the course of those two days. 2005 was the hardest year I have lived thus far, yet it is ending on some of the most positive feelings I have felt in years.
In 2005 I watched huge changes be made in my area under my leadership. Changes that have made huge differences in both the Cast Members and the attractions they work. I saw two Cast Members I had worked hard to develop become two of the strongest leaders in my area. Both showed traits of commitment and the desire to do the right thing for the Cast and Resort. Both are traits I have strongly relied on throughout my career. Knowing that I will no longer be a Lead after the first of the year and knowing how strong the two of them become leaves me with a sense of accomplishment knowing that they can fill my shoes and continue where I left off.
This year was also my first year of marriage, and though they say that the first year is always the hardest I dont think mine could have been much harder. Through sickness and health, for richer or for poorer, we faced it all. We were forced to borrow thousands from my parents to help with outstanding debt when Misty was forced to quit her job when she went into the hospital. Not until about a month ago were we actually able to get back on our feet and get up to date on our own. Atop all these things the regular marital battles of man versus woman a battle that always lead back to the lack of understanding because we dont always think like one another and one would always expect the other to know what they were thinking. However, even after all of this we still love one another as much as they day we were married.
I spent the latter half of August fearing for Mistys safety and well being and did things I never thought I would do for someone, but I did because I loved her and knew I needed to. The first night she was in the hospital and the doctor expressed that her condition could be fatal I panicked. Ive never had to look loss or death straight in the face. In all other cases I would have turned the other way and distanced myself from it. On that day I had no choice but to look it straight in the face. I was numb, I was scared, but I knew I had to be strong for her since she couldnt be strong for herself. In the end the condition wasnt as bad as the ER doctor made it out to be and after a few tiny incisions and just under a week in the hospital she was as good as new. I know there will be many more cases like this in my life, however facing it just under a year of being married can really open your eyes.
Reflecting on 2005 I see just how strong I can be. Though there were a lot of tears, a lot of yelling, a lot of doubt, in the end it has all turned out ok. As January 1, 2006 nears I am seeing the light at the end of a very long and very dark tunnel. With a focus on financial independence, good health, and perhaps a new career path I am moving towards that light with open arms. The world has thrown me lemons all year, and I think its about time I opened up a lemonade stand and did something with those lemons. Ive learned a lot this year. First and foremost dont take the ones you love for granted, you never know when they could be gone. Never let failure get the best of you. In the end acceptance of your loss will bring you to peace with yourself and those around you will embrace you for that. Lastly take time to embrace life and the world around you. In a world plagued by fast this and express that, we often forget to stop to experience the world around us. Some of my best memories of this year were spent just listening and observing. Youd be amazed to see the beauty that surrounds us. Whether it is the laughter and innocence of a small child or taking the time to appreciate a summer breeze as it blows through your hair, take time to savor it. Slow down on your way to work. If you get up a little bit earlier you may feel tired, but in the end your less stressed and in most cases arent as tired as you feel. Enjoy a healthy breakfast, sip a cup of coffee (or favorite energy drink) on your way in to work, listen to some uplifting music, and know that since youre not doing 90 on the 91 theres a chance youll live to see another day and have the opportunity to do it all over again tomorrow.